Dustin Johnson's "Major" Curse...

Wow. I mean... Wow. I don't want to take away from Martin Kaymer's well-deserved victory, but good-golly-miss-molly~!

How do you explain what happened in the final round at Whistling Straits except for complete disaster?

QUESTION: Could this 2-stroke penalty on Dustin Johnson been prevented if the Rules Officials themselves roped off the bunker or marked it OB in the first place?

ANSWER: Yes.

Why bother having rules officials set up a golf course for a Major Championship if they can't do it right? Blocking off a trap in deemed "in play" is a basic rules official task? No?

As Dustin stepped onto the 18th tee-box with a 1-shot lead, par was all he needed. Dustin blasted his drive WAY left into the "crowd". The lye was stomped and trampled for (most likely) 6 days prior, as practice rounds and regular play rolled through.

After Dustin missed a small put to win the tournament, Martin Wilson, head of the the PGA rules committee, notified Dustin of his error. Good thing Dustin wasn't a crazy woman with PMS!;) He then told the media (after the 2-strokes were made final) that he would take Dustin into the CBS truck to show him a larger image of him grounding the club. Wasn't that nice of Martin? (middle finger up in air).

Dustin knows the roles of golf, that's not the point. Dustin's 18th hole situation needed proper assistance, clearly. A good friend was penalized 2 strokes last year on the Duramed Futures Tour because her dad fell into the bunker while walking alongside her as a "spectator". Her playing-competitor said that her dad was "testing the sand" and called on the Rules Official who concurred. Aside from the fact that the playing-competitor is a giant-beeotch, this situation is in the same family... Spectators don't belong in traps!

So, like... maybe Martin Wilson shoulda taken better control of markings and roping... but it's never "their" fault is it? It is this time! Too bad that Dustin had to take the cake...

Confirmation on the Conformation!

Sarah Brown + Conforming PING Wedge = Disqualified? WTF?

Here's the scoop: Sarah Brown, a Duramed Futures Tour Player, was DQ'd because a rules official decided to pull her off the course for using a wedge they "thought" to be non-conforming. Her dad pleading for her to at the least finish her round, (being 3 shots off the lead and about to have her best showing EVER in competitive golf) was denied that right - And then, OOOOOOOOPS!? Sarah's wedge was totally conforming... like, sorry.

Head in my hands and vomit feeling in my tummy...

"We made a mistake," said David Higdon, Chief Communications Officer for the LPGA.

Sarah being the sweet girl that she is, agreed that people make mistakes. Here's the deal Sarah... YOU PAY THE FUTURES TOUR/LPGA so that YOU CAN PLAY PRO GOLF. Knoweldgeable staff is hired to execute a job well-done. This week was a payday and a movement in rankings, and that was taken away, by error.

Zayra Calderon, (CEO of the Duramed Futures Tour) has officially apologized to Sarah for the mistake. Zayra is the same person that noted when I was playing the DFT and on the player board that, playing on the Duramed Futures Tour was not about making a living, it was about learning how to get to the next level, it's a "developmental" tour. Ahhhh yes, Wendy's Chili and rollin' 5-deep at the Knights Inn was a way of life in 2004... :)

Making a living is an issue, especially with what it costs to be out there. Sarah Brown needs a GIANT apology from the LPGA in payment/exemption format of 5K and an entry into 2010 LPGA Qualifying School. A sorry band-aid from Zayra or a media shout-out from Higdon is politically correct, but perhaps not the be-all-end-all. These ladies fight on and off the course to have a slim-chance at success in Women's Golf, there is little to no money to be made in the Futures purses and sponsorships. These ladies find a way to fund their dream that essentially runs a loss and forever remains a gamble. What happened to Sarah was unacceptable.

Women's professional golf has too many hard-working individuals and world-class athletes to have mediocre tour management that make silly errors that not only cost the growth of the tour, but inevitably hold back success of rising stars.

Paula's Comeback is AWESOME!

Pretty in pink, Paula Creamer won the US Women's Open with style, elegance and determination. To be honest, I think she was more shocked than anyone else... She was challenging the top of the leaderboard the whole time!?

Following up with some of my friends and colleagues who played the Open and the ever so fabulous Oakmont Golf & Country Club said the course was difficult and sooooo not friendly! Paula was able to battle and close the deal with a 4-shot victory. Oakmont is Paula's BFF if you ask me!:) It was amazing to see, and this is EXACTLY what the Women's Golf World needs, a cute pink heroin with poise and grace who can deliver results.

Congrats! Xo.

Embarassment at it's Peak!

Today I set my alarm to make sure that I had my Starbucks in hand to watch "The Tiger Woods Press Conference" live streaming on TMZ in addition to simultaneous live CNN Coverage on the tube.

I thought it was clever of him to time this the way he did, Accenture got a pinch on the butt-cheeks:)

I then proceeded to work all day and listen to CNN "babble on" and "break down" the "Tiger Woods breaks his Silence Conference". It's still shockingly awkward and uncomfortable to hear the media talk about Tiger Woods and Golf. THE BEST was CNN interviewing Nick Faldo?! WTF?! Hahahaha... that is like taking AA recovery tips from a drunk! How soon we forget how Faldo's ex smashed his beloved Porche with a 7-iron... I am SOOO over this hypocritical mess that is making a mockery of my sport.

I officially feel bad for Tiger, and although he may have "deserved" to be "punished"... Having a porn star who looks like the Wendy's chick "all-grown-up" crying her eyes out talkin' bout how she wants Tiger to apologize to her when he's trying to apologize to the world? How embarrassing!!!

Your 5 minutes of fame is up. Move on ladies...

I like Dustin Johnson.

Who says Golf is getting boring? I like Dustin Johnson, I think that he's a great guy! He seems like a genuine chap. I'm happy he won, despite a seriously awkward ending...? ;p How about that hot & steamy awards presentation where Clint Eastwood and Du-Jo shared the stage;) David Duval making a comeback isn't too shabby to watch either... Nice...

A few years back, Kim Kouwabunpat and I were at the Honda Classic, we were introduced to Dustin through a mutual friend on tour. He "told it like it is", he "kept it real", if that means anything to the ol'folk. Basically, in the first few moments we were talking about sports, music, college, and local hotspots, it wasn't uptight. He didn't have his khakis in a wad;)

There was a rain delay so we got to hang out and talk golf for a bit, he was a rookie on tour at the time. We were explaining what Play Golf Designs http://www.playgolfdesigns.com/ was and told him that we were doing at a PGA Tour event, other than chillin' with bloody mary's;) Funny you should ask Dustin... Basically, at the time we thought it would be cute to advertise with the PGA Tour and waste money. Note to self: Advertise with the PGA Tour during Majors.

I liked that he selflessly asked about Women's Golf and didn't brush it off with what he was going to do on the finishing dog-leg left hole. He cared y'all.

Seeing him win again yesterday made me smile. Dustin Johnson gets a Golf Couture stamp of approval. Good to see the young guns in action, keep it up!

My Take on Tiger

I would have bet Judy Rankin to crap her Depends before Tiger Woods debuted as a 45-minute HOT TOPIC on Nancy Grace last night! Wow. Seriously.

This is TIGER WOODS! The man. The legend. The daddy-mac that "be texin' ho's in different area codes?" Hmmm...

I am the BIGGEST Tiger Woods Fan in the world (and oddly after last night, so is Nancy Grace?). The only other superstar bigger than Tiger Woods is Michael Jackson. What do they have in common? Other than being all over my bedroom walls (blushing), they'll continue to be back-stabbed and lied about by media at any and all costs!

"Da couzin of da' couzin of da man that washed Tiger's Escalade lass Fryday" will come up with some story to sell to media. We ALL will act shocked as each detail emerges! Coincidentally, we ALL reside in a bigoted and intrusive society and all that glitters isn't gold. Does it matter if we know if Tiger is promiscuous or not? Really?

Another vixen has stepped on to the tee-box of cheats and lies. The only thing that this story is helping is that Golf is now cool enough to grace The Cover of US Weekly and National Enquirer! Like, even Graeme McDowell got a shout out on TMZ! Can I getta "waat waat"! Sick Coverage Dude!:)

What's your favorite part of this HOT "F''n MESS? The visual of the actual accident in which Tiger and Elin say it went down, TMZ's crack-addict coverage, or the bizarrely slow-dispatch in the 911 call that I can now hear in my sleep because it is on every channel and website?

My favorite is Rachel Uchitel. She's quoted saying intellectually stimulating things like, "I've never sex-texted in my life!" (fart noise) I feel bad for her if she didn't do anything:( Awwww... Gloria Allred will make betta fo' you:)

THE LESSON LEARNED: The next time you see Tiger (or J-LO) on the tube or in the magz lookin' all "glam and fab"... be grateful that you aren't a hot piece of *** and you don't have millions of dollars from various global corporate entities that people want to steal from you. Smile and take the kids to McDonalds! :) It is a happy place with no painkillers... Just Cheeseburgers, which can take the place of painkillers...

50 Cent is in Lakeland Florida Homies!

Yo check it! So Elena Kurokawa and Grace Woo, former UNLV Running Rebels and current Golf Hotties, were in Lakeland Florida for Duramed Futures Tour Q-school and just wanted to fill their Chevy Cobalt Rental with gas! Little did they know that they were going to bump into the G-Unit Creator/Wangsta himself... 50 CENT!

So Grace spotted him on his cell and immediately informed Elena that it was him. Elena was like "Oh my gosh Gracey, no it's not." To which Grace responded "Yes it is!" and then started screaming. I couldn't help but wonder... What if they were in a Pontiac and drinking Vitamin Water?

So they went over and asked his 5-man entourage if they could have a picture. The one guy, who we now think is head of 50-Cent's "posse", told them "no". He was obviously jealous that 2 hot asian-golfing-goddesses didn't want a picture with him. (LOSER!) Elena and Grace never gave up, "Please. Please. (5 second pause) Why not? Please?" they persisted.

All of a sudden... there was a knock coming from inside the vehicle. (Not the Cobalt, the Yukon) Fiddy was waving them over to his window for a pic! "HIP HIP HOORAY!" Elena and Grace cheered:)
50 was really busy on his phone and didnt have time to chit chat and talk about his next album or nuthin. He just smiled and tickled them like little Pillsbury dough boys!

"I used to think he was cute. Now I am obsessed! I love 50 cent!" Said Elena as she drove out of the "Raceway" gas station on her way to Huntington Hills Golf Club for the Duramed Futures Tour Qualifying practice round. The tournament starts on Monday November 2 - Friday November 6, 2009. http://www.duramedfuturestour.com/

Best of luck ladies! Oh and it was Grace's Birthday yesterday too! "Go shawty, it's yo' Birfday!" Xo.