Happy Birthday Tiger!

Tiger Woods turns the magical age of 33 today! I dont know why age 33 is magical, but I'm sure Tiger will show us this year when he dusts off the ol' clubs in the garage!

Dear Tiger: Have an enjoyable day with the family today, chip a few, maybe even play 9. Have a cocktail, get a massage, buy yourself a new Maserati or a hire someone to fan your face and press your feet for 24 hours. Call up Michael Jordan and tell him to bring you some cupcakes with sprinkles...

Whatever floats your boat... you are Tiger Woods damnit! You are the man, even during the off-season sweetie:)

Image: (AP Photo/Rene Macura/file)

Cop, Bartender, Transexual & Long Drive Champion

Who says Golf is boring? From cop to bartender to transvestite to long-drive champion. Should we call on Ace-Ventura for this one?

Golfweek.com's James Achenbach: "The new women's world champion in the event (re/max long drive) is a 55-year-old bartender who used to be a man. Although golf is a sport largely without controversy, the reign of long-drive queen Lana Lawless, (formerly Larry Nivens) who lives in Palm Springs, Calif., is expected to be neither tranquil nor uneventful." Easy there Achenbach...!?

Lana Lawless: "In Palm Springs, I'm like celebrity central," she said, "Hey, I carry myself well, I'm well-spoken, I'm funny as hell. I fit in with a world that is expanding its acceptance."

To keep things in a random perspective, Paul Hunn is interestingly enough also a celebrity in his hometown of Enfield, North London, holding the record for the loudest burp. 'Twas a burp of 104.9 decibels (about as loud as an airplane taking off). He trains by eating curries and kebabs and drinking fizzy drinks.

ESPN: "In 2005, the USGA approved transgender involvement in competition." Cool.

Golf Couture: I'd rather read Lana Lawless's autobiography before Sarah Palin's 7-million dollar autobiography. Donuts, Vodka, Breast Implants and Golf!
(Image: Banggolf/FoxSports.com/Askmen.com)

Williams talkin' Smack!

T-Woods is blasting back onto the media scene as caddy/BFF Steve Williams talks smack about Phil Mickelson... oooooohhhhh!!! "I wouldn't call Mickelson a great player ... 'cause I hate the pr*ck."- He says. "Tiger doesn't like him too much."- He says. Williams even makes mention of stories regarding Phil's "Manb**bs"! Way Harsh:)

Steve Williams - MSNBC: “I don’t deny that him and I don’t get along,” Steve Williams told The Associated Press from his home in New Zealand. “I shouldn’t have said it, but no harm was meant. I was just having some fun.”

Tiger Woods - Golf-Fanhouse.com: "I was disappointed to read the comments attributed to Steve Williams about Phil Mickelson, a player that I respect," Woods said in a statement Monday. "It was inappropriate. The matter has been discussed and dealt with."

Oh Snap! Can you imagine Tiger dealing with it? If it were me, I would make sure to put on a lot of lipgloss, a sorry puppy face and wear my 5-inch red pumps (Tiger loves red;) and a black Miracle Bra from Victoria's Secret so he's slightly distracted while lecturing me;) WOW! ...but it would be interesing to hear how Steve prepared?

In response to the Chuck-e-Cheese comments made by Williams, Phil Mickelson said, "All I could think of was how lucky I am to have a class act like Bones (his caddie, Jim Mackay) on my bag and representing me."

5-points for Phil and minus-10 points for Steve! TEAM PHIL - I never thought the day would come?

Note to Steve Williams: Dude. Not cool dude:( I mean, you're pretty cool because you hang out with Tiger Woods 24-7, but that doesn't give you the right to talk smack (openly-at least), in fact it means the opposite son! Finally, Don't hate the PLAYA, hate the GAME! Golf Couture, keepin' it real...

Lewis, Wie, Rawson enter the Big Leagues

For all the Michelle Wie haters, Wie has now secured her spot on the 2009 LPGA Tour. Whether they realize it - this is the most amazing thing to happen to Womens Golf in a LONG time. Wie has answered her critics, and most importantly, proved something to herself.

Golf Couture is thankful that Wie was able to take correct lateral drops during competition while managing to sign her scorecard after her round all 5 days of Q-School - Whew! That was the biggest hurdle for her, trust me... qualifying was a no brainer for Wie.

Stacey Lewis, the University of Arkansas step-up, finished medalist at Q-School and topped Wie by six shots, finishing at -18 under par. Lewis won the 2007 NCAA Championships as an individual and never looked back.

Recently signing a deal with Mizuno, Lewis said, "I've used Mizuno clubs ever since my freshman year at Arkansas and have enjoyed success with them throughout my collegiate career,” said Lewis. “As a professional, there was really no reason to play any other club. I'm looking forward to a long and successful partnership with Mizuno."

Anna Rawson, one of our personal faves here at Golf Couture;) - earned her card with a T-12 finish at -8 under par. The LPGA should be truly thanking their lucky stars for this! She will bring coolness, fashion, sexy and hotness onto the course with a graceful elegance. A pre-2009 THANK YOU ANNA:)

So while we say bye to Annika, we say hello to some amazing women ready to take the Womens Golf World by storm! YAY:)

Golfin' Obama!

I was on youtube.com, just "youtoobing" random things - because when you are single and in your 20's, that is what you do these days... and I find Obama (aka "HOT LEFTY") golfing in Honolulu!~Woot Woot! Just when I thought he was too good to be true, he reassures me that he is! Now if he'll only reconsider higher-taxes for the small-business:)... but that's a whole new blog sweetie!

Click here to see: Obama Golfing

About.com's Brent Kelly writes these Golfing Tidbits:

... In June, after clinching the Democratic presidential nomination, Obama played golf in the Chicago area with a few campaign aides.

"They went to a golf course, and they swung golf clubs," campaign spokesman Robert Gibbs said on MSNBC's Morning Joe. "But I don't think it was real pretty."

Of the past 17 United States presidents, USA Today says, 14 were golfers. Only Herbert Hoover, Jimmy Carter and Harry Truman were not golfers. Two bad presidents and one great one.

I will leave you on this note...

Appleby calls Daly "Train Wreck" & GM X's Tiger

Everyone loves to talk smack about John Daly! Perhaps it's the only way to get your "name in the news" if you're Stewart Appleby, and no one cares that you're ranked 35th in the world? Maybe if you updated your visors from the 90's Stewart darling?

According to ESPN Golf: "John Daly is unique," Appleby said. "As players, we only wish that he put a little bit more time into his game and less time into ruining his personal life. He would be a draw card, not just a freak card, because he's so gifted it's a joke."

Golf Couture: Dear Stewart, can you say "harsh"? I mean c'mon you bandwagon rider! Sure, Daly is havin' some probs, but how 'bout some words of positivity? Reach out to him bruh, since he's in your "wishes" and all... I wish my body looked like Britney Spears' in the "I'm a slave for you" video, and so I'm on the treadmill for that extra mile and eat plain oatmeal for breakfast (yuck!).

Appleby continues via golfchannel.com: "I'm not quite sure how that works. I guess he's a walking train wreck and unfortunately, people turn their heads to watch the train wreck."

Golf Couture: You're almost right Stewie, except when you folded up like cheap lawn furniture at the Masters and Players Championship, cameras turned heads away and didn't air your "train wreck"? Hmmmmmmm... Harsh!

Top News: On a lighter and fluffier note, GM will drop it's 7-million dollar endorsement deal with Mr. Tiger Woods, aka Mr. Hot Birdie Machine! Something tells me he will manage just fine...

Annika Go Bye Bye

Well Forks, we've come to an end of an era... we say goodbye to Annika Sorenstam. She single handedly took Women's Golf and made it recognizabe and exciting!

Aside from the 8 LPGA player of the year titles, the only woman to shoot 59 in a competitive round, being 1 of 6 players to achieve the women's career Grand Slam, and being the first woman in 58 years to compete on the PGA Tour (2003 Bank of America Colonial), you can't help but feel a simple and genuine connection with her.

On http://www.lpga.com/ they created a "Quick 18 with Annika Sorenstam" interview, and we were there to give our 2 cents!

LPGA: What is your biggest pet peeve?
Annika: People driving slowly in the left lane.
Golf Couture: Me too! How bout just people picking their nose and driving slow? Geez!

LPGA: What is your favorite store to shop in?
Annika: I'm not much for clothes shopping and things of that nature, so I'll say Whole Foods or Fresh Market for groceries.
Golf Couture: Annika darling, we all know that you picked up a better short game in trade for your fashion sense, it is no mystery. I got your back with Whole Foods girlfriend!

LPGA: If you could be on a reality TV show which one would you choose?
Annika: I hope to get on Dancing with the Stars at some point.
Golf Couture: We called it Annika!

LPGA: Name one thing you always keep stocked in your refrigerator?
Annika: Silk. It's Vanilla Soy Milk.
Golf Couture: Water bottles, diet coke, olives, roasted chicken and yogurt:)
Real Deal: We say goodbye, but lets be honest... there is a good chance that she pulls a "Jack Nicklaus" and plays in a few more majors to keep the "hype". It's a solid marketing ploy and so what if she takes a spot from a "strugging and broke touring pro"? People love to see Annika and the event will thrive.

With pending golf course development/construction, an expanding "Annika" clothing line and a golf academy school... hype is mandatory!

JD Hooters Overload

Whoops-a-Daly! John Daly had a bit too much to drink at the ever classy "Hooters" establishment in Salem, North Carolina.

AOL Sports: Daly was held in custody Sunday after police said he was drunk off his arse in a Winston-Salem, NC restaurant.(Hooters)


Police officers were called at 2:17 a.m. to the Hooters at 120 Hanes Square Circle on a medical call. When officers arrived, Daly, who had earlier lost consciousness, was being treated by EMS. Daly "appeared extremely intoxicated and uncooperative," police stated in a news release. Daly refused to be escorted to the hospital and was eventually asked to leave the restaurant by workers there.
JD clearly has some issues that he must deal with. He should give good ol' Britney Spears a ring-a-ling and ask for some rehab advice. Even Britney can't believe that JD is still throwin' down like he's a 24 year-old pop star! Daly is 42 years old (not 24) and has some work to do. Rumor has it he was selling his signed knick-knacks for some quick cash... yikes, even Brit wouldn't go there!

Gulbis Takes on Reality TV

Natalie Gulbis is a officially a TV celebrity ...and rightfully so Ms. Thang! After "missing the cut" at the Safeway this past August, Natalie has been "missing in action"? Answer: Natalie is going to star on the next Celebrity Apprentice which is currently wrapping up filming in New York!

In the same format as celebrity apprentice season one, it'll bring business-savvy celebrity contestants together to compete in business driven tasks around New York City. They'll use their fame, business skills, wealth and high-profile connections to win challenges. SWEEEEEEEEEEET!

"Girls Gone Wild" Entrepreneur and self-proclaimed pervert Joe Francis was a scheduled castmemeber, but has pulled out... hold your tears:( The confirmed "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" sub-star to appear alongside Natalie G is Khloe Kardashian:) Sidenote: D-List Khloe Kardashian is Lil' sis to B-List Kim Kardashian who has moved up tremendously in the Celebrity World with a mix of being BFF status with Paris Hilton, making a "dirty homevideo" with former BF (and really bad rap artist) Ray-J, and her current hot relationship with Reggie Bush... oh, and a recent "short-lived" Dancing with the Stars crapshoot ...and it helps that she is beyond gorgeous! Claudia Jordan will also be alongside Natalie and Khloe! You may recognize this beauty from Deal or No Deal with a silver briefcase on lower level left of the showroom. Rumor has it that she gets eliminated early in the competiton, woooooooooooooooooooh!BuddyTV.com: Other scheduled Cast Members are Brande Roderick, Playboy/Baywatch girl, and the annoying Joan Rivers with her slightly less annoying daughter, Melissa Rivers. Herschel Walker, former awesome NFL star and Brian McKnight, 90's smooth R&B singer.

Scott Hamilton, the really short gold-medal winning figure skater/commentator and Jennie Finch (no clue?). Finally, Annie Duke, a pro-poker-player, Dennis Rodman (heee's baa-aack!), Andrew Dice Clay, Tom Green, Sandra Bullock's Hubby Jesse James, Clint Black, and my personal fave Tionne “T-Boz” Watkins, former member of TLC!

I'm glad that Women's Golf continues to be thrown on the celebrity map! Who better than the experienced and gorgeous Natalie Gulbis to represent in style! Go get 'em girl!

Retief Moves Eco-Friendly AHEAD

Ladies (and gentlemen), any day that I get to talk about Retief Goosen... is a GOOD DAY!

Fairway Golf Magazine: AHEAD headwear and apparel endorsee Retief Goosen debuted the company's new eco-friendly polo collection this past week in Bermuda. The new line is scheduled into golf shops this November, and has enjoyed a strong sell-in this fall. Kudos to AHEAD for going GREEN!

So like, this one time... I met "The Goose" at the Honda Classic. It was this past year in West Palm Be-atch! OMG! A self-proclaimed PGA Tour crazed-fan, flippin' out n' fumblin' my lip-gloss, I made it to Retief across the room with poise. He is nothing shy of AMAZING! Such a polite gentleman... ok, I'm done bragging!!!Retief wears his clothes well and AHEAD will move their eco-friendly brand AHEAD with him aboard. He is simply a graceful man with a calm, endearing and elegant presence... Goosen is Golf's McDreamy!

Cost: AHEAD's eco-friendly collection is available in a variety of color patterns and will retail between $45-$65.

Jeff Waller, AHEAD National Sales Director: "We all need to start thinking green to better our lives for the future." If Retief's giving me the GREEN LIGHT, I'm a GO!

ADT drops LPGA & Madonna drops Ritchie

In The News, ADT pulls the plug on the LPGA Tour and Madonna will divorce her husband, Guy Ritchie. At least we know that the economy isn't effecting both matters? ...or does it?

Golf World's Ron Sirak: The $1 million first prize ADT Championship, the first event fully owned by the LPGA, has lost the title sponsor for the season-ending event after this year's competition in November. Currently, the ADT is played at Trump International in West Palm Beach, Florida.

LPGA Comissioner, Carolyn Bivens: "The next 30 to 45 days is a critical time," she said "in this economy, until you have a signed contract nothing is buttoned up." Hmmmm, facinating yet intriguing at once...

UK Times Online: The pop singer (Madonna) is reported not to have signed a pre-nuptial agreement with Guy Ritchie, which might have helped to limit his ultimate payout.

Every Pop Culture Media Outlet: Madonna wants out of marriage... no pre-nup? Does A-Rod have a chance to reclaim his "soul mate"? Or will we, like broken-hearted Cynthia Rodriguez, have to sit back and wait until the "Sticky & Sweet" Madonna Power Concert Tour comes to an end to find out? In the meantime, will A-Rod be a face in the concert crowd, now that baseball season is done for the Yankees? All these questions!!! I can't wait for next week's In Touch cover!

AHA! Perhaps Bivens and Madonna could get together and exchange advice in regards to long-term contractual agreements between partners? Or Maybe Madonna can sponsor the ADT? Justin Timberlake helped the PGA Tour salvage their Las Vegas venue? Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock... We only got 4 minutes to Save the World!

Caddy on the Mike!

Now that Tiger Woods is in rehabilitation, his caddy and friend, Mr. Steve Williams is looking for ways to fill time. I mean, lets be honest - Steve can only go bungee jumping so many times, and how do you practice caddying? Its not like if he practices his short game it's gonna rub off on Tiger, although I may be on to something here...

The handsome and strapping New Zealander is going to be debuting his "tv personality skills" as a TV analyst for the recently sanctioned Kiwi Challenge in his nativeland of New Zealand.

Participants: Anthony Kim, Adam Scott, Hunter Mahan and Brandt Snedeker. WOW!!! Take notes Fed-ex:)

Event Layout: On October 27th & 28th, the young PGA stars will play 36 holes, on Kauri Cliffs GC and Cape Kidnappers GC, with the winner of the stroke-play event getting $1.5 million of the $2.6 million purse. So, if I do the math... basically the losers divy up $1.1 Milli, but take home a "kiwi experience..." Sweet deal!

Associated Press: “I’m doing this because the Kiwi Challenge will bring great exposure for New Zealand and give New Zealanders the opportunity to see four of the world’s best players in one group." - Steve Williams

Caddy on the Mike! I'm sure Steve will do a fabulous job and will be a positive promotional figure for the PGA event and New Zealand. Kiwis are Kool!

The Fed-Ex Cup Apology

Today at the Post Office, I paid $46.57 to send a 3-page client contract and image CD to Miami within a 48-hour period. It made me wonder...

Am I paying ungodly mailing amounts so that FedEx can sponsor the PGA Tour in the most absurd fashion? In the last 2 years, FedEx Cup Winners have been established before year end... at my expense?

I'd like to meet the Fed-Einstein that came up with the FedEx Cup Concept, Was he on his 5th Kettle-Tonic when he thought he'd come up with something better than The Bullet Blender? 20-Milli (plus all the bells and whistles) is a lot to clear for a "not so great" idea that has failed back2back on the PGA Tour.

I think that Fed Ex owes me an apology: I don't want a ring like Kobe gave Vanessa after he came back from Colorado!

...A White Bentley (Driver, 24' Rims included) and the 2009 Gucci Shoe n' Bag collection for my Vegas Bash at The Palms Hugh Hefner Suite with J-Lo & Mariah:) Oh... and Rod Stewart too... Oh one more thing Mr. FedEx, can the Entourage Cast come too? Pleeeeeease??? YAY! Woot Woot! Let the 2007 & 2008 suspense rollover (like Cingular minutes) into The 2009 FedEx Cup... Party at the Palms:)

Hwanhee hugs OJ

LPGA's Hwanhee Lee was on her way to church last week with her parents, going about her routine Sunday prayers. "Make me a good person and give me the ability to golf like Tiger Woods." She'd just returned to Vegas (where she resides) from LA, and was preparing for Q-School. Randall Cunningham (former UNLV Football and NFL legend), church leader, asked everyone in attendance to turn to their neighbor and give them a "hug":)

Hwanhee turned to her father on her right, embracing him with love. She hugged the lady with frizzy hair in front... and to her left she embraced OJ Simpson! Hwanhee called me immediately to tell me the breaking news! She was all, "Holy crap, I just hugged OJ Simpson in church! He is shrinking." I was all, "OMG HWANHEE?!" OJ in Church? What was he askin' fo'? After the service was over, people were staring and wondering what he was doing there? Hwanhee could hear the whispers of mass confusion around her.

Even her father was in awe. It was like when we all found out that Lindsay Lohan was a drunk bisexual... everyone was in shock, but at the end of the day, nobody gives a sh*t! Who says that a day in the life of a professional golfer is boring? Not in Vegas Baby!

Note to Las Vegas Travellers: Yes, there are churches in Las Vegas used for things other than "drive thru marriages", and rates at Palace Station are 1/2 off during the OJ Trial... Holla.

Johnny Miller likes Ice Cream

Associated Press: Johnny Miller is doubting Paul Azinger’s Captain's picks for this week's Ryder Cup. Miller said he would have chosen Verplank, Mediate, Snedeker and Zach Johnson over Holmes and Campbell, but said his views are like arguing over favorite ice cream flavors.

What does this mean? Does Johnny Miller argue over ice cream flavors? With who? Is it just over flavor... or does cone/cup size matter? Cold Stone or Baskin Robbins? If he was with me and ma' homie Kim, he'd totally be at like, Pinkberry or Golden Spoon! No doubt:)

Dear Johnny, I don't get it? Maybe I'm just "in my 20's and confused"...

But Johnny, if we have the chance to go for ice cream... I'm a simple woman, and I'd go for a basic chocolate twist at McDonalds if it means not having you embarrass me at Ben & Jerry's in public. I'd take an ice cream Snickers from 711 if it came down to that.

In Conclusion: Firstly, Miller scored low on the "Analogy" section of the SAT's in high school back in the dizzle. Finally, arguing over ice cream is awkward for everyone and is NOT suggested. Class dismissed:)

Lookalikes

Fabulous South African Golfer Ernie Els, and Gorgeous Actor and Celebrity Liam Neeson are Golf Couture Lookalikes. Although Neeson has higher cheeckbones, Ernie has a better golf swing and a bigger smile.

"Camel Toe" Exclusive

Recently we had the opportunity to an Exclusive Interview with Sports Legend & Phenomenon, Camel Toe. We discuss its' long lasting relationship with the game of Golf...

Golf Couture: Welcome Camel Toe! So nice to have you here at the International Corporate Headquarters of Golf Couture.

Camel Toe: Thanks for having me. It's rarely that I'm anywhere else but on golf course these days, except when I'm running... (Slight chuckle)

Golf Couture: (Slight chuckle back'atcha C-Toe) Why don't you tell our readers who you are?

Camel Toe: Well, basically I'm what happens to you when you wear standard length shorts and spend all day walking up n' down the fairway. I am the piece of short that rides-up between your legs creating ... what I like to call the "Camel Toe Effect".

Golf Couture: Interesting... Now, how is it... (slight pause for breath and thought) that we as "golf fashion victims" can prevent this tragic occurrence?

Camel Toe: I'm glad you asked that question. Here are ways to "Banish your Camel Toe":

1. Wear a "slimmer" (not smaller) fitting short. It will prevent the "riding up" and shape the fit of your shorts.
2. Buy items with a Lycra %. Lycra helps cling to the body so everything is held in place. Use it, but pleeeeease don't abuse it!
3. Don't be afraid of "Pants" or "Capri's". They're your friends when you're having those "not so great" weeks, like after Christmas, Thanksgiving or Easter.
4. "Squats and Sprints". This step is "self explanatory":)
5. "The Skort" is the Number 1 Solution to ending all camel toes of all shapes and sizes. It is safe, sexy and performable.

Golf Couture: Well folks, you read it here first. Once again, saving you from basic golf errors, because that is what we do here at Golf Couture: Where Education collides with Fashion. I'd like to thank Camel Toe again for joining us, next week... Wedgies:)

Vijay vs Villegas

At this week's stop in STL, Villegas won his first PGA event, beating out Jim "flat abs" Furyk (the guy has washboard abs, I swear!) and Vijay Singh in the final round.

Vijay Singh

Nothing dropped in the cup for "Chief Lotsa-Dough" yesterday, all "The Veej" has to do is make the cut at the next tour stop in Kentucky and the FedEx Cup is his.

Associated Press: "Singh refused to speak to NBC Sports and walked briskly past a group of other media after finishing his round."

Translation: "I played like crap today, so why would I wanna talk to you? Talk to my banker, he's pre-counting my Fed-Ex Cup 10 Milli (pronounced mill-ee, code word for "millions"). Why don't you blow my comments on Women's golf outta proportion again and give Bivens props from me on the new policy... Peace."

Camillo Villegas

What can you say about Camillo Villegas? He sorta reminds me of a cross-between "the polite towel boy at the Puerto Vallarta ClubMed Pool that you can't stop staring at" and "Rafael Nadal"... No?

Associated Press: "A marketing dream, Villegas gave golf fans a real reason to pay attention to him."

Translation: Find the word "cool" in the dictionary and you will see this picture. I'm spider-man with nice hair and sick game. Bring it!

Villegas was a grateful winner in saying, "They keep asking me when am I going to win, and I guess they've got it now. I finally did it, not only for me but everybody back home." Quote of the Day on Pgatour.com

Hmmmmmmm... Can't decide, I like 'em both:) The End.

D-Listed: LPGA

Associated Press: California State Senator, Leland Yee is questioning whether the extremely annoying, tactful, yet miserable new LPGA policy is breaking any laws or is violating basic discrimination policies in the workplace.

Good News for the LPGA and the new policy isn't coming easy. Yikes... How is Carolyn Bivens sleeping at night? As if the LPGA needs any more drama now. This situation puts the LPGA on the D-List.

Golf Channel: "If the lawyers see a possible federal violation, Yee said he will turn that finding over to California’s congressional delegation." Geeeeeez. Whatever that means, it sounds serious:( I'll keep it simple for you...

The LPGA is like J-Lo's career: J-Lo moved from D-List to A-list with bad decisions followed by good ones! Great songs, jaw-dropping videos, unique fashion styles, amazing choreography and catchy beats... This is just a "P.Diddy" after party gone bad or a "Gigli" performance by the LPGA. Hopefully the post-break-up media mess with Ben Affleck (policy nightmare) goes over well and the LPGA finds it's Marc Anthony (happy ending with better policy and image:)

Good News: The LPGA will bounce back with time:)

Croc of Sh*t

CBS Sports' Chuck Stogal discusses CROCS latest and greatest "Croc Golf Shoe" or as I like to call 'em "The Ugliest Golf Footwear Collection in the World".

Stogal reports that the Croc Golf Sandal was, "...cited for comfort, stability and, with a suggested retail price of $39.99, for 'tremendous value'" based on a CBS experiment study of a variety of golfers. (Alrighteeee then, sigh...)

Once again folks, we must decide whether "tremendous value" prevails against looking like a "jacka** monkey" on the golf course. We must review the basic rules.

The 5 "unspoken" truths of Golf Sandals:

Rule #1: You will lose at least 10 golfing buddies within the first week of purchase

Rule #2: You will lose a minimum of 5 sales deals (which you could've closed by spending $30.00 more on lower end basic Nike golf shoes)

Rule #3: You are accepting a minimum 5-shot penalty for that particular round and several future mental distractions

Rule #4: Girls (golf staff, even the chipmunks) will think you are:

a. bad at golf

b. have no style

c. frugal and sloppy

Rule #5: Everyone's laughing and feels wierd around you, but telling you "how cool" your sandals are to your face.

"Golf Sandal Wizard" and Bite (Crocs) Founder, Dale Bantham explains, "Remember, walking a golf course covers five, six miles. If we can take out some weight that other, traditional shoes don't, it will help lessen foot fatigue and chances are you will score better."

(Ya, and Britney will get full-custody of her kids back this year!)

Sorry Brit:( Research and technology are trying to prove me wrong. Clearly I'm NO "Founder of Bite", but I am the Founder of this Golf Couture blog, and my job is to SAVE YOU from fashion disasters that will take your Level of Cool to Zero!!! You are welcome:)

Image: Bite & Crocs Golf

Tiger Baby #2

Tiger Woods has announced that he an Elin are having baby #2 via his website http://www.tigerwoods.com/

I'm happy that little Sam will be a "big sister" soon. She should be aware that "younger sibings" make life difficult and annoying in the beginning, but as you get older you realize that they are truly inspiring individuals.

Excuse me while I shed these tears of joy...

Tiger is a winner in so many ways. Congrats:)